Tuesday, April 24, 2012

{three things=one}

So, I was reading a friends blog, I don't even know how I got there in the first place, seeing as how I'm trying to compose the damn modulation part of my POD song but that's another story. What I read was her opinion and I respect it. (Hi!(: I know you're reading this!) This, I suppose, are my thoughts and reflections about the situation she was referring to.

So basically, she talked about a girl liking another girl's boyfriend, and the boy being okay with it. So far, so good. Hell, if guys liked me, I'd go to RJ and say 'HAH! Look somebardy wants me!! I'm attractive!! Faster go buy me Gong Cha then I stay with you horr!'. It's all 'bout the ego stroking. I don't have the best self-esteem ever and I definitely need some compliments once in awhile. It gets stale, sometimes, in a relationship, when your significant other seems to be the only one who thinks 'Hot diggety damn, I'd do that!' And maybe they don't say it because they don't feel it needs to be said anymore. Then along comes someone who is just so damn attracted to your awesome awesome-ness.

Seriously, don't lie and say you don't feel even the teeniest tiniest bit flattered when someone says that they like you. Even if you don't like said person. It's nice to be wanted. Of course, it's amazing to be loved by the one you love, but some ego stroking isn't gonna harm anyone. Provided, of course, you don't encourage it and purposely seek that person out just to feel better about yourself. Nothing good is going to come of that.

On the other side of the fence, I also want to say that I don't think it's wrong to happen to just fall for a friend who is attached. This is what my friend said too, and I agree. Things just happen. They really do. However I think if it does happen, it is YOUR ISSUE and not the couple's. Don't make it their issue. Especially if you're going to overflow with confessions of true lurrve and 'You belong with meeeeeeeeee!' Maybe physically, it wouldn't be so dangerous? I mean saying you think I'm hot and all. Please, go ahead. HAHAHA. Seriously though, I wouldn't confess; I wouldn't want to be an influence in someone else's relationship.

Especially for a serious relationship. For me, once I hit... 16 or 17 I think? My mindset on relationships changed. I think all of us go through that stage where we just want a boyfriend because everyone had one and blah blah blah. It's so annoying now, lol, but I remember that stage. But after that stage came acceptance that it would happen when it happened and it did. I also knew that if I got into a relationship, it would be because I could envision a future with him, because ultimately you get in a relationship because you're looking for the person to spend the rest of your life with. To marry. To me, that's a serious relationship. Especially after it hits over a year.

I'm not saying that I know for sure that RJ is gonna be my baby daddy & sugar daddy. I don't. I'm sure he doesn't either. I think we can only say this after a few years (Looking at you Nadia & Jon! My fave couple!), and that's okay. I can see the next few years with him, I want the next few years with him and I'm sure he feels the same. But after the next few years, I can say yes with confidence fo sho, because if I couldn't say yes, then I'm just wasting our time.

So, back to the blog post. What if RJ suddenly fell for someone else, someone that I KNEW liked him. Am I entitled to be pissed? YES. Depending on the circumstances, I could be pissed off at her for stealing him away, if she encouraged it. But if it just happened when they were PLATONIC FRIENDS, I'd be pissed off at HIM because I trusted him. I agree with my friend that if said girl didn't actively try to steal him away, then no she isn't a slut and I won't fault her.... too much. But I disagree when she said, 'Why be so possessive?'

Um... because he's my boyfriend? Am I just supposed to say, 'Oh hey, not like I was gonna marry you anyway. Go ahead, baby!'



I will be possessive and pissed off and depressed because I love him, and I trusted him and he was MINE. I sound like a plaintive whiny child but it's true. I will not let him go wholeheartedly. Unless he was cheating on me or some shit like that. I was with him because I thought we had a future, and lots of girls think like this too. Except all you playa hoes, you go away. So this is out to all those people who say, 'Get over it. Don't be so possessive. Like you and him were gonna last anyway'. I was with him because I thought we at least had some future! I wanted to try and go where we could! Let's see how you feel when your boyfriend dumps you for another girl he fell for. And let's not even get started on the big blow to the ego.

Even if you are some 15 year old girl, I do feel your pain. Really. We always think it's meant to be at that age. But please get over it. It's not worth it and the puppy love stage rarely ever lasts. I think 15 year old girls are entitled to be immature about this, anyway. No matter what age or stage, if your boyfriend dumped you for someone else, by all means get angry and be possessive! You were with him because you envisioned some sort of future with him, and when it shatters, you are the one left broken. (Once again, excluding the playas)

And I especially hate those people who like someone a little bit, when that someone is so head over heels for them, and after leading them on say they're sorry but they need to figure out their feelings, figure our what they want. Fuck you, figure it out first before breaking hearts. BUT... I suppose this is one of those growing processes. Unless you're my age then go fuck a mailbox or something. Just not mine, I have a package coming. -throws confetti-

So, I had two other things to talk about but seeing as how I wrote an essay, that's for another day. Back to *sigh* POD.

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